Total Suckage

Welp, it’s been a while.  I’ve been struggling mentally and physically.  England had a cold snap and some snow and omg, my hips were killing me!  I cried more than once due to the pain.  When my head is elsewhere, trying to deal with chronic pain, my diet seems to suffer.  I concentrate on making it through the day alive, rather than making healthy choices. Thus, I have to report, I have gained weight.  I am back up to 462.  Damn.

If there is one thing I have learned through this journey, is that if you don’t give up during the tough times, the motivation will return and weight loss will continue.  It’s February today.  It’s a month of happiness and sadness.  My 6 year wedding anniversary is coming up, happy times. But it is also 6 years since I was hospitalised with an ectopic pregnancy, 12 weeks along.  It’s tough.  I will get through it, as I have for the past 5 years, but the experience was a little traumatic.  I was in a country where I only knew one person, my husband, and I was being told there was a good chance I wasn’t going to live through it.  Needless to say, the thought of having a baby of my own does not rate highly on my to-do list.

I see my surgical team next Friday. Hopefully, finger-crossed and all that, I will get an idea of when I can have my next op as I have been on the waiting list since Aug 2011 :/  I’m leaning towards the DS again….only because it can be easily un-done if things were to go wrong, heaven forbid.  I guess I just have to see what the surgeon says.  All I know is I need more help shifting a large amount of weight.  The good news is, last time I was them I was 217kg and this time I will be at least 209kg if not lighter.  So, lighter is always good.

I wish I had some great motivating news, but I don’t.  I’m struggling physically and ever day is spent in a lot of pain.  I will keep on, keeping on….still logging my food, but that’s about as far as it goes right now.

 

oh and P.S. my psoriasis is now all gone.  Has been for a couple of months.  Going gluten free cleared it all within 3 months 🙂

 

 

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This entry was posted in arthritic hips, arthritis, arthritis diet, Diet, Disability, Disabled, DS, Health, Losing Weight, Obesity, osteoarthritis, Pain, Psorasis and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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